What the HECK am I doing with my life?

Pre-move to the woods I had a plan.
I was taking classes and gonna go back to school.
I was juggling it all pretty well.
I had a routine. (Wake, eat, get kids to school, workout, work part time from home, volunteer, study, read, visit goodwill, REPEAT)

But then the life changed!
The changes have not been bad but it's new and I don't feel like I quite fit in my new life.  I feel like the freshman new to campus walking around with the map trying to understand why someone said my  class was in a building named after an STD. (It was just an abbreviation for Smith Family Living Center, how it became syphilis I don't know.)

I am lost.
I attended a meeting Sunday where a licensed therapist spoke and although everything she said made sense it was like, "Well that was nice. Now how the HECK do I do it?"

The advice was valid but I felt like I was given a cake mix with no instructions on how to get it together.
Some advice given:
"Create Something": Well that's great. I am not very creative. I appreciate art and music but I am not talented enough to sing or brave enough to fail.
"Find Someone to Trust": I have some people that I trust completely. Luckily my number one is my hubby. But sometimes he doesn't get it.  My others are far, far away. So I have some just none here, yet!
"Find a Passion": I can't even find my pants...not all my pants, but that is neither here nor there. I seem to be so crippled that I cannot even imagine that I was ever passionate about anything.  Was I ever really moved to do anything unless FEAR was my number one motivator.
"Get Moving": I was doing so well at this back in the land of sun and fire but now with a more costly option it seems so much harder. Never mind that I have gained a robust 12 pounds since relocating to Cullen-land. I am working on getting there but I HATE RUNNING! I have to imagine a zombie chasing me or running towards one of my children in harm's way before I even get up any kind of speed.
"LAUGH": I enjoy laughing but again this can be difficult. Things are either too vulgar to be funny or I just want to cry...

So I am a hot mess!
How to proceed?  Do I really want to change? Do I really want to be found?

Now, I have 40lbs to lose and nearly 34 years to understand so carpe diem and let's just see if I can finally become creative, trust, find a passion, get moving-really moving and laugh!